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What did the Soviet Union call their system of production and consumption?
The Ecommieny
A woman walks into a grocery store.
She heads to the produce aisle and sees a man stocking the shelves. “Excuse me where are your onions?” “Ma’am we don’t have any onions today” the man replied. “Nonsense, I know you have onions today” she replied. “ ma’am we really don’t” he said again. “ yes you do” was her response. He sighed and decided on a different approach to get through to her. “Take the po out of potatoes” he said to her. “What?” She said. “Just humour me.” “Ok… you get tatoes” “Now take the to out of tomatoes” he said. “You get matoes” she said. “Good now take the fugg out of onions.” She paused for about 5 seconds before snapping. “There is no fugginonions!” That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you the man replied.
What did Qatar get after spending billions of dollars to stop LGBTQ+ actions in FIFA 2022?
Half naked Argentinian Men Hugging and kissing each other in the end.
after my wife found my letters I had to come clean and tell her I was cheating
She said she will never play scrabble with me again
I really got into investing in those DTF’s
But whenever I arrange a trade men come over and have sex with me for money. And i gotta tell ya this market has been a real pain in the ass .
An examiner is testing a student
Examiner: Ok, so read this sentence for me *shows student a page that says ‘The man had a knife’* Student: “The man had a kuh-nife!” Examiner: Do you want to try that again? Remember to pay extra attention to the last word. Student: “The man had a kuh-nife?” The examiner lets the student leave. The entire class doesn’t recognise the silent k. He later talks to their teacher. Examiner: Why do your students not understand this sentence??? Teacher: I don’t kuh-now!
I saw these three guys beating on my cheating ex so I ran over to help.
The four of us sure kicked her whore ass!
How can you tell an engineer is extroverted?
When speaking to them they look at your shoes.
Well, to tell the truth...
Father: Son, your mother and I are very concerned about your lying. We want you to always be truthful. Son: Really? Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy...