Things better not to say - random entries
... at a Date ...
... Jokes ...When I die I want to be cremated.
It will be my last chance to have a smoking hot body.
What is the similarity between Griffith from Berserk and black people?
They both want wings.
What do you get when you play a country song backwards?
You get your pickup truck back, you get your girlfriend back, you get your dog back.
My friend came back to town…
… after travelling the world for 13 years. I was so excited to see her, and she was really excited to tell me about her time abroad!
We talked and, after a while, i offered her a ham sandwich. She said no and was rather insulted, which was strange because it used to be her favorite when we were kids. I asked if she still ate meat, and she said no.
Assuming she had just gone vegan, we went down the street to a pub that served vegan food. I offered to buy here a beer, but she refused saying she didn’t drink anymore. Now I was worried about her, because she used to love beer before she left!
The night was getting long, and I asked her if she wanted to stay the night in my guest room. She felt uncomfortable and said she was going to leave.
This was totally unlike her, so I asked her if she was okay. She explained she had changed her religion recently. Everything I had been suggesting went against her beliefs. Exasperated, I shouted “It’s been 13 years! I didn’t know you were a Sikh, Ada!”
Have you heard of Daisy?
A joke I overheard after my Ivy League phD class :
Girl : do you know Daisy
Guy : no who is that?
Girl : DAI-SY deez NUTS in your face
Why do podiatrists make great detectives?
Because they can always sense when trouble is afoot.
What do quantum computing and Jada Smith have in common?
Both are involved in entanglements.
What school does Harry Styles go to?
I don’t know but what i do know is his career path only took him in one direction
Did you hear about the snake who worked for the government?
He was a civil serpent.
Yet another joke from Sunny
okay this is something more personal, you see im German, there is not a problem with that. but some people from other countries still believe we are racists, evil and whatnot. and i want to tell you guys its not true, you cant judge a book by its cover like that. i like black people, everybody should have one.
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
>!and now i wait for the first person who got offended by this joke!<