Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...There is nothing wrong with making love with the light on…
just make sure the car door is closed.
... during Sex ...The 5 tips for life: Say what is true. Drink what is clear. Eat what is ready. Collect what is rare. And fuck what`s there.
A cop arrests 3 ducks who were in the pond late at night.
He asks the first one: “What are you doing in the pond so late?” First duck replies “Blowing bubbles.” The cop rolls his eyes and asks the second duck: “And what were you doing in the pond so late?” The second duck answers: “Blowing bubbles.” He turns to the third duck: “And what were you doing? Lemme guess, blowing bubbles?”
The third duck says: “no, I’m Bubbles.”
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a bar
The bartender says, “What can I get you?”
And the rabbit says, “I don’t know. I’m just here because of autocorrect.”
I’m working on book that teaches midgets how to do math.
I call it making the little things count.
You know what I haven’t heard much about recently? Flat earthers
Almost like they fell off the face of the earth
When a plant is sad…
Do you think other plants photosympathize with it?
Why did judge Judy go to school
SHE CRUNCH ON THE KIDS! cruncha muncha
Our local fish market ranks their catches on how rare they are
I noticed today that they had rare salmon. It definitely isn’t common plaice!
Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?
Because it’s they only way they’ll ever get love.