Things better not to say - random entries

Why won’t Trump go to jail?
He can’t finish sentences.

What do you call a woman tied to a jetty?
Maude

I Wish My Grass Was Emo
Then it would cut itself

Why was the coffee sad?
Why was the coffee sad? Because it got mugged.

I’m pitching a show about magical arts in the legal system
Subpoena the Teenage Witch

Why did the farmer cross the road?
Because he couldn’t get his dick out of the chicken

Fishy joke that I dreamt last night
An Asian guy goes into a restaurant and is talking to the waiter. The waiter says "I had a dream of being a goldfish last night". The guy says "are you trying to be Koi?"

What’s the difference between Batman and Black Panther?
Batman Returns.

One thing i really love about Dead Baby jokes
They never get old

What do you call a camel that looks the same walking forward as it does walking backward?
A palindromedary.

I lost my gold bar.
Au man!

Met a hippy girl tonight and she asked me what my sign was
I told her this was a sign and I got the hell out of there

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10.
How careless of me!