Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...How do you make a woman angry when you tell a joke?
Hold on, she’s still trying to decide if she’s offended
I might not be the best boomer in the world
But I must be doing something right.....
Because people keep telling me I’m an “OK boomer.”
What type of people won’t stop warning about the end of the world?
Flat earthers
Trump’s third marriage is successful for one simple reason:
He and Melania agreed to have sex in different locations.
true story
I stopped by my local Chevy Dealership this morning to look for a new truck. I saw a nice Silverado 1500 loaded with all the options that I liked and asked to take it for a test drive.
The salesperson (a lady wearing a Biden for President lapel pin) sat in the passenger seat next to me, describing the truck and all its options. She explained that the Electric Seats were connected to the ventilation system and could be set to direct cool air to your butt in the summer & warm air to your butt in the winter.
So I mentioned that this must be a "Trump truck". She looked at me a bit angry, and asked why I thought it was a Trump truck. I told her that if it were a Biden truck, the seats would just blow smoke up my ass year round.
The two mile walk back to the dealership to pick up my truck was worth it.
It’s a 5 minute walk from my house to the pub. It’s a 30 minute walk from the pub to my house.
The difference is staggering.
My favorite season is autumn; I love the pumpkin spice, furry boots and yoga pants..
My friends, however, told me that I look kind of gay.
Spend your time with benefit
Spend your time with benefit - find a girl named Benefit
What do you call
What do you call a Buddhist monk meditating mindfully?
Omomatopoeia
What is the difference between guns and women in the United States?
The former has more rights and attention than the latter.
You hear about the monarch who ejaculated every time they farted?
Ol’ King Toot-n-cummin’.