Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...Vince McMahon: I want to see you in my office.
John Cena: Well, you can try.
What’s the difference between Batman and Black Panther?
Batman Returns.
I quit my position as a scuba diving instructor the first day at my job.
Deep down, I realized it wasn’t for me.
What do you get when you cross a seafood restaurant with a brothel?
Fish tacos
There is a new line of cards for those who have lost a loved one in a mass shooting...
...brought to you by Hallmarksman.
... at a Date ...A man with dementia walks into a bar
He spots a pretty lady, sits next to her and asks, "So, do I come here often?"
Why are there so many stupid people in the world?
Because shitty parents don’t know how to swallow
A boy asks his father how he was born
The father answers: "When me and mommy were young, we planted a seed. And everyday, we took great care of that seed. The seed soon turned into a sapling, and that sapling turned into a large and beautiful tree. Then we dried the leaves from the tree, smoked it, got extremely high, fucked with no protection."
Learning photography is hard.
Last week I got kicked out of a photography workshop for indecent exposure.
A last-minute filer walked into our state income tax office and handed me his returns.
Just as he did, a peal of laughter could be heard in another room.
Glaring at me, he grumbled, *“What are they doing back there, counting the money?”*