Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...What does the Serbian soccer team have in common with a crack head?
They are very itchy
The internet reacted well to James Corden being cast as John Lennon
People would pay top dollar to watch James Corden get shot.
Politicians go visit a school
High ranking politicians visit a school. The top one goes over the expenses and decides to make adjustments to cut costs.
"The lunch portions are too big. Cut them in half. Internet connection too fast. Too many computers."
After that, they go to a preschool. Again, the expenses are too great.
"The lunch portions are too big. Reduce them to half. Too many toys around."
After the preschool, they go to a prison.
"The lunch portions are too small and the selection is too limited. Get faster broadband and more comfortable beds. TVs are too old. Get a few consoles as well."
One of them asks the leader, baffled:
- Are you mad? We just cut costs in schools and prechools, and now you do this?
- My friend! We will never go to school or preschool again. But we can still easily end up here...
... while Playing Videogames ...Oh no... I still have so many games ahead of me :(
What do the Queen and Elvis have in common?
They both died on the throne.
... at a upscale establishment ...In front of the emergency exit sign: "I like this a lot, these clear structures, the hard contrast of green and white and yet this urge for freedom."
There are two muffins baking in the oven. One muffin says to the other, “Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?” The other muffin says....
“AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!”
A cob of corn finishes his service in the army and retires
as a Colonel in good standing among his field
As a gaming enthusiast, I also overclock my Apple Watch and it has become so much faster.
For example, it now takes only half the time until the next recharge.
Why is “reverse cowgirl” illegal in Alabama?
Because you never turn your back on family.