Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...Dad joke of the day
What do you call a girl who broke up with you via Instagram?
A DMX
I am not sure if my friend is lying about him scaling the top of Mount Everest.
I think…… he made it up.
If you are ever looking for some advice, you should contact a surgeon specialising in circumcision.
They have plenty of tips.
I got my medications mixed up.
I confused my anti-depressant medication with my erectile dysfunction medication. Life just keeps getting harder.
So my wife walked in on me fucking our daughter
Idk what she was more surprised by, me fucking our daughter, or that the abortion clinic gave me the fetus.
Why do divers always jump backwards to enter the water?
Because if they jumped forward they would smash their faces with the boat.
I told my therapist about my obsession with the number 12.
But she dozen seem to care.
Santa Claus and the Grinch were at the same Christmas Party...
When Godzilla showed up, it was no longer a party. It was a roit.
The guy has a birthday
His girlfriend decides to give him her virginity as a birthday present.
She enters the room completely naked, with a cute ribbon bow right on her pussy and says "Here is your birthday gift!"
"All right", he says with a sigh and folds his sleeve to the elbow. "How deep is it?"