Things better not to say - random entries

Husband:”we should have sex more often!”
Wife:”But we have sex almost every day!” Husband: “Almost every day??? How’s that???” Wife: “ Well, almost on Monday, almost on Tuesday, almost on Wednesday….”

What did George Michael and wellington boots have in common?
They both got sucked off in bogs.

What did one hamburger bun say to the other hamburger bun?
Nothing. They had beef between them.

I decided to start a latin tequila company
Im calling it Agave Maria

Question for Radio Eriwan:
Question for Radio Eriwan: Is it correct that comrade Wassiljewitsch was arrested and sentenced to 35y of prison for calling comrade Stalin an idiot on the last party congress? Answer: Basically yes. He was immediately arrested and sentenced. And he was sentenced to 35y but not for insulting a fellow comrade but for leaking classified information.

2022 World Cup has been a bit untidy...
What a **messy** tournament... ​ (Sorry, I naturally tend to very basic and silly jokes lol)

What do China and the U.S have in common with each other?
The United States lets it’s citizens make fun of the nation’s government. China also lets it’s citizens make fun of the U.S government

Its considered annoying to get a kink in your hose
Which is strange, because most people like kinky hoes

How many Nails did it take for the Crucifixion of Jesus?
I dunno, probably a Handful?

- The XXL burger with double fries, please. - And what may I serve for the main course? - Good waiter

What instrument do fish play?
The bass guitar

Their was this movie about constipation
It never came out

A Husband was doing a crossword puzzle with his wife
Husband: Empathic no, 5 letters Wife: never H: Pistol 3 letters W: gun H: Disgust 3 letters W: ugh H: Charity 4 letters W: give H: Female sheep 3 W: ewe H: Pixar Movie 2 W: Up