Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...Why did Marvin the Martian turn off Safesearch?
It obstructed his view of penis.
How many marketers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just reposition the room!
I did a thing! Enjoy my hard work.
What did the Southern cowboy mechanic say when he first met a car that wasn’t a manual?
“We’ll I auto be alarmed!”
(NB - Manual is what we call it here - you might call it stick shift etc)
Bull
A week after John bought a bull, he complained to his friend, “All that bull does is eat grass. Won’t even look at a cow.”
“Take him to the vet,” his friend suggested.
The next week, John is much happier. “The vet gave him some pills, and the bull serviced all of my cows!” he told his pal. “Then he broke through the fence and bred with all my neighbor’s cows! He’s like a machine!”
“What kind of pills were they?” asked the friend.
“I don’t know, but they’ve got a peppermint taste.”
A horse walks into a bar...
And the bartender says "why the long dick?"
An urban legend about Chuck E Cheese
Have you ever suspected their real boss is actually Chucky? He started that business to look for his next target.
“Welcome to my place kiddo. Let me take a picture of you. Cheese!” That’s Chucky Cheese.
How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Three. One to change the bulb and two to chastise them for performing such a menial task as a member of a proud warrior race.
... to Blondes ...Why does a blonde sprinkle pepper over the TV? To make the picture sharper.
Did you hear about Mario traveling to Paris with his brother? Mario found visiting places named after traditional occult items to be exciting, ...
.... however le ouija bored.