Things better not to say - random entries
... to Blondes ...Why is it assumed that Rapunzel was a blonde? - Quite simply, anyone else would have thrown down the keys!
... to your Friends ...I always go out when my girlfriend sings - to show the neighbors that I don`t hit them.
I bought a new alarm clock today, do you want to hear it ring in the morning?
... Jokes ...How does male flower part introduce himself to the lady part ?
Hi. I am Andrew C Yum
... at a upscale establishment ...I started at the bottom and somehow managed to sink even lower.
Having lesbian parents must be GREAT
Instead of punishing you when you get in trouble, they just say “wait til your dad gets home!”
“Let’s get Retarded” by Black Eyed Peas hit my playlist once while I was a case manager in my 20’s while driving a van full of developmentally challenged adults
Right when the song first came out (and before the radio edit), I happened to work for a nonprofit organization that assisted people with developmental disabilities. My colleagues and I would provide transportation, and vocational support.
I used to play music off of my iPod, and I made it a point that nothing I ever played at work had any curse words or explicit content. Well, I guess this one slipped through.
I’ve never seen a van full of people be happier and bounce around more enthusiastically then the passengers that day, they absolutely loved the song. My coworker and I exchanged shocked glances, and we didn’t even know what to do, so we just danced along. Looking back to that day, we were all “retarded.”
You know what they say about bald men…
…they’re just as annoying as men with hair.
A man exits his church…
As he is leaving, he sees a flyer on the outside of the building. It reads, “Father Daniel is preaching for next week’s sermon, on the 22nd.” The senior pastor always delivers a strong message, the guy thought to himself. Anyways, he heads to his grocery store to get his week’s food, and sees the same flyer all over the grocery store. “Okay, my church family is just encouraging people to come,” he thought. After getting his items, he walks out to his car and there are flyers all over that, too! “OK, they’re making sure I am certain on showing up next Sunday.” Finally, as he is driving home and approaching his neighborhood, every house is covered with these flyers, including his. He is taken aback and decides to go back to the church, and to the pastor’s office to see what is going on. Upon asking him why there are flyers all over town, the pastor replies, “Oh yeah, this happens quite often when I put up a flyer. This community just loves to repost for some reason!”