The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

Whenever the atheist goes to the bathroom

He pees but never popes

Why are blonde jokes so short?

Else can men not remember them!

Did you hear about that business tycoon who made a fortune selling young poultry?

Dude was a total chick magnate.

I walked in on my brother masturbating

He yelled "Close the damn door, and stop playing with yourself!"

Why are the countries that were colonized by England upset about that their stuff were looted/stolen?

They shouldn’t be. They have been being paid in exposure at the British Museum.

My ex-wife still misses me

But her aim is starting to improve

What do you call a mad immigrant?

An immi-grunt!

My 8-year-old son got our maid pregnant.

The little bastard punctured my condoms.

What do gamers call a quickie?

a Flash Bang.

If your favorite character is rich AF, has a friend named Robin, wears luxurious suits and is very active at night...

Then he is not Bruce Wayne, he is Barney Stinson.

Why did Mr. Miyagi kick Daniel out after he hit puberty?

He caught him wax on, wacks off

What do you call a lip-synching goat?

Billi Vanilli.

A con man, an asshole and a moron enter a bar

What can I get you Mr. Trump, asked the barman