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The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:


Alec Baldwin has resumed shooting on the set of Rust.

In other news, filming will resume next week.

I found an old Kurt Cobain pic the other day

Talk about a blast from the past

How do you make rocky mountain oysters?

Boil the piss out of them.

I was on a date with a woman who said she wanted to remain a virgin for the rest of her life.

I said, "Get fucked".

What do you call a Navy Admiral who gambles, smokes, drinks and does drugs?

a Vice Admiral

What’s it like to work in HVAC?

It blows! Lots of venting and heated conversations.

How many letters are in the alphabet?

22, because E.T. went home and somebody shot J.R.

What happens if someone puts 1 micron/grain of fentanyl in my fry, as a joke?

​ (french fry)

If you clean your vacuum...

You are actually vacuum cleaner

Why are artists bad at physics?

If you ask them for a dot product, they’ll start making pointillism

How do you get a gay guy to fuck a woman?

Shit in her pussy

A guitar can never break 2 strings.

It can only become a large ukulele. [Mitch Hedberg RIP.]

Did you hear that Donald Trump tried to escape to Mexico?

But Joe Biden was wise to this and built a wall.

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