The pickle factory worker

Jim worked in a pickle factory, and one day he got the strongest urge to stick his penis in the pickle slicer. He knew he shouldn’t do it, but the urges were just too much. He went to the on call psychologist offered through his employer and confided his urge with them. First session: Jim: “I’m sorry doc, I just can’t stop thinking about it, what do I do?” Doctor: “well, I’ve got some breathing techniques you can try and it just might help.” Jim gives the techniques a shot, but to no avail. The urge is still there. 2nd session: Jim: “I just can’t stop thinking about it!” Dr: “next time you have the urge, think about all the horrible consequences and trauma that it will cause” Jim does this, but again to no avail. 3rd session: Jim: “doctor, I’m at the end of my rope here, please help me” Dr: “Jim, there’s nothing else I can do for you. You know the consequences, so if you do decide to act on your urge, then you know what will happen.” Of course, the urge doesn’t go away, Jim sticks his penis in the pickle slicer, and he’s subsequently fired from his job. He gets home, down trodden and depressed, and his wife asked him what happened. Jim: “I’m sorry honey, but I stuck my penis in the pickle slicer, and they immediately fired me.” Shocked, his wife walks up to him, pulls his pants down, only to see a fully intact penis. Wife: “what the hell happened to the pickle slicer?” Jim: “oh, she also got fired.”